What Better Way to Start than with a Rerun!

Now I intend for this blog to "move forward" and be completely new and original. However, I must bring with me the one post in my 10+ years with Gamespot that I am most proud of. You may view the original here if you wish, but here is the post in its entirety:

How To Get Your Woman Into Gaming

At least once a week, I'll see a thread from somebody who is desperate to get their significant other (usually a woman) into videogames. Speaking from experience, I can tell you it isn't very easy. However it is possible. When we first married, my wife hated the fact that I played videogames so much. Now I have her asking if she can join in at least once or twice a week. Here's some of my more useful tips and observations.

1. Lower Your Expectations - The number one rule is to lower your expectations. No matter how hard you try, you will probably never get your lady to enjoy marathon sessions of Final Fantasy or endless death-matches as much as you do. Don't bother with this goal. Your first goal should be to identify what she enjoys playing. This takes us into rule number two.

2. Play Fun & Friendly Games With Her - Most girls are not into sports games or any games that involve killing and/or gratuitous violence. A great place to start is with puzzle games. Nobody can resist Tetris. That's a fact. Dance Dance Revolution is another game that will eventually get her off the couch and onto the Dance Pad. Women also seem to like games where they get to tell people what to do. The astounding success of The Sims and Animal Crossing is a great testament to this.

3. Keep the Action / Fun Coming - As I mentioned in rule number two, women often enjoy games where they can tell people what to do. With this in mind, it would seem that RPGs would be a no brainer. Strangely though, most women don't get into RPGs. Even though the entire point of RPGs is telling people what to do, it is often accompanied by lenghty narratives and then violent fights. Complicated battle systems don't help matters any. It is my observation that women like a game with very few breaks between gameplay and gameplay that is consistently fun.

4. Don't Try to Dazzle Her - Women are almost never impressed by graphical showcases. It goes back to rule number three. I remember the first time I played Final Fantasy X. I was so floored by the graphics that I called my wife in to watch. She watched the cinemas and admitted that the graphics looked "nice", but once I started playing she said it looked "boring" and buried her nose into a magazine. Think of it in terms of looking for a girlfriend/boyfriend. A man will usually go for the attractive blonde even if she's an idiot. Women will be less discriminating when it comes to looks as long as the guy is fun. It the same with games.

5. Don't Force Her to Play - This is a huge female gaming no-no. If you both are in the middle of a race in GT4 and she wants to quit, let her. Don't ask her to finish the race. Let her play whatever, whenever she wants. This also holds true when she wants to join in. Let's say you are playing a game of Hot Shots Golf Fore. You're playing the round of your life. You're on the 13th hole and you've shot a -15 so far. Suddenly, she says she wants you to quit so the two of you can play Karaoke Revolution. Do it. Don't ask her to let you finish the round. No woman likes to be told "no and/or wait". In fact, if you say "no/wait" she may hesitate to even ask next time. Don't worry, if you shoot -15 once, you can do it again. In fact, you should thank her for wanting to play with you...which leads us to our next rule:

6. Compliments! Compliment! Compliments! - As Chris Rock once said, "Women need air, food, water and complimnents!" No matter what may be happening, tell your lady how well she is doing. This can be tricky as women are quick to pick up on an obvious lie or exaggeration. If she makes a good move, let her know. If she makes a bad move, tell her "Good try" or "Let's do that again, I know you'll get it this time!". NEVER, EVER criticize her for doing something in a way you would not. If it takes her 3 minutes to find an item you can get in 30 seconds, say something like, "Hey good job! I never knew you could get to the (item) that way!" If you are playing competitively, let her win sometimes...but make it look good! ;-) Also, be sure to let her know just how much you enjoy gaming with her. While she is playing, give her a kiss on the cheek and tell her how much you appreciate her playing with you and that it makes you feel so much closer with her.

7. Take An Active Interest In Her Hobbies Too - This is a tough one for most guys. But trust me, you'll be paid back in spades. Women are all about reciprocation. If she enjoys gardening, take her shopping for and then help her plant some flowers. If she likes reading, surprise her and take her to the bookstore to buy a new book. You get the idea. The next time you are gaming, your lady will remember your efforts and will probably offer to join in playing, even if she might not really want to.

In the end, the most important tip is still rule number one. Don't expect her to enjoy gaming as much as you do. In fact, you shouldn't really expect her to enjoy gaming at all. The key to happiness in your woman/gaming relationship is to get to the point where she respects your gaming habits and doesn't give you any crap about it. To achieve this, the key is to pay more attention to your lady than you do to videogames. Or at least make her feel that this is the case. A good half-hour of doting and pampering your significant other is almost always guaranteed to net you an hour or two of hassle-free gaming. Ideally, our women would love videogames as much as we do. However, in most cases that's not the way it is. By following these simple tips, you too will hopefully be able to get your lady/man/significant other to accept your gaming practices and maybe even get into it too! Good Luck!